The Spender vs. The Saver

I believe that in every relationship, one person is the saver, one person is the spender. The degree can vary, but I think it's rare that two people have the exact same outlook on the big M (that's money, if you're new to my blog).

In my relationship with the Mr., I'm the saver. Some might even call me cheap, penny-pinching, overly thrifty, whatever. I take that as a compliment, thankyouverymuch! My dear husband is the spender in our relationship. He loves nothing better than to buy "something nice" after payday, bonus time, tax return time, or hell, just because it's a Tuesday night with nothing to do. In my opinion, there are pros and cons to each side:

Saver
Pro: it's good to save money for a rainy day. You never know when you'll have a financial emergency
Pro: Some people (read: me) get a thrill out of transferring money from checking into savings. Victory!
Pro: Most Americans are bad with money. I'm planning for the future.
Con: Money issues really stress me out. Bad.
Con: I have a hard time letting loose and treating myself to something nice once in a while.

Spender
Pro: You worked hard for that money! You deserve to have some fun. The Mr. reminds me of this frequently.
Pro: As long as your bills are paid, what's wrong with going on vacation, buying nice Christmas gifts, or sprucing up your wardrobe. The Mr. is also very generous with gifts for loved ones. This is something I really admire.
Pro: Sometimes higher price does equal higher quality.
Cons: Bankruptcy. (Okay, I'm probably being a little dramatic)
Cons: When the economy is unstable, you never know how long the big and/or steady paychecks will last.

The Mr. and I are trying to reconcile my obsessive love of frugality with his appreciation for the finer things in life.

I've come to the conclusion, though, that when we are going back and forth about buying something we "need", he's right more often than not. (Don't send him this link! I'll never live it down!)

Here's a quick example. I have long hair. We also own a golden retriever. Between the two of us, all the hair broke our vacuum cleaner. Sigh. Of course, the Mr. wants a top-of-the-line Dyson. I want whatever's on clearance at Target. I finally give in and tell him we can get the Dyson, but I WILL find it on sale.

Fast forward one week. Between Macy's summer sale and some extra coupons, I score a Dyson for $200 off. I am pretty proud of this. I get home, assemble it, and I swear to you, I vacuumed up enough hair to make a whole dog. Maybe sometimes paying a little extra for quality is worth it.

I'd love to hear from you in the comments. Does your family have a saver and a spender?

Weddings: Everyone has a budget

There are lot of expenses that young adults face, and for a lot of people, a wedding is one of them.

Shameless plug: This blog is a re-post from my company's blog--I own a marketing & events company with a business partner and we help a lot of brides and grooms navigate the world of weddings. Check it out. 

I thought it was a pertinent topic here, as well.

Reading wedding magazines or watching shows like "Say Yes to the Dress" may make you think that you're the only one on a budget, and that every other bride (or groom) in the world can spend, spend, spend on an over-the-top wedding.

In real life, however, everyone has a price point. Every couple we've worked with has a limit, regardless of who is paying for the wedding. It's important to keep a little perspective as you're planning.

Here are our top five wedding budgeting tips that we always tell all of our clients.

1. Spreadsheet, spreadsheet, spreadsheet. The very first thing you should do (after calling all of your family and friends, of course) is talk about your budget. No, it's not glamorous, but you must do it. Knowing how much you are willing to spend from the start will help you navigate all of the options in front of you, and be realistic about what you can afford.

2. Stop comparing yourself to other couples. So what if you went to a wedding last weekend where you drank from a Cristal champagne fountain, the bride wore a custom-made Vera Wang gown, and U2 was the live entertainment. Who cares. Your wedding will be special, because it's yours. The rest is just details.

3. Decide what is most important to you. Maybe you love photography so you want to book the city's most famous wedding photographer. Perhaps you love the look of letterpress and calligraphy invitations. Whatever it is, every couple has one or two must-haves on their list. That's great--fit them into your budget if at all possible, but something's got to give. Decide which wedding details aren't that important to you. Maybe you have a friend who can do the flowers. Perhaps you don't even like wedding cake and can settle for cookies from a local bakery. Sit down and make a list, from most important to least important, and go from there.

4. Always ask for discounts. Anytime you are in conversation with a vendor, ask if they have any specials. Many photographers will throw in a free session of engagement pictures. Your venue may give you a better deal if you get married in low season, or on a Friday or Sunday. Ask your florist if they can substitute in-season flowers for exotic ones that have to be flown in. Worst case, they say no, but at least you've tried!

5. Pay for a day-of wedding coordinator. We're not just saying that because we want your business (which we do). You've spent months planning your big day, counting your pennies, and scrutinizing your guest list. Don't let all of your hard work go to waste. Save enough money in your budget to hire someone to handle all the details on your big day. You want to enjoy the time with your new husband/wife, hang out with your wedding party and family, and really ENJOY! You only get to do this once, after all!  And a bonus: We provide unlimited phone and email contact to all of our day-of clients. We can help you find great vendors, give advice on budgeting, and more.

On Sharing Money

It's a well-known fact that I'm a huge fan of Slate. I love it for its fresh take on news, its advice columns, and its interesting blogs and bloggers.

There is a regular column called "Home Economics" about personal finances, and recently there was a 5 part series about a couple deciding how to manage their money together (or separate).

She broke couples up into three types: Common Potters, who have one joint account for everything; Sometimes Sharers; and Independent Operators, who maintain their separate accounts throughout life.

The Mr. and I are Common Potters--we joined our accounts when we bought our house, before we were married, and never looked back. However, the data calculator says that, in our demographic, 50% of people are Sometimes Sharers, 40% are Common Potters, and 10% keep separate accounts entirely.

Check this out:

• Common Potters have, on average, been together 11 years (we're at a whopping two).
• Percentage who are married: 94.1% (got it).
• Average age: 34.5 (our average age is 29.5...close enough).
• Percentage with children: 45.8% (not yet!)

Read the rest of the article here. It's a little different for everyone. What works for you? Let me know in the comments below!